Month: September 2020

I’m not sure whether I’ll go through and elucidate all of the bullshit with Ariana for the Year in Review but I know that people have questions about me, her, the drama, etc. Here’s your chance to get your questions answered.

Why?

1. There are things I wish I’d known about Arianna and her patterns of abuse. This is a chance for me to help the next person
2. Arianna is really good at keeping people from talking to each other. She talks about me all the time and makes me out to be some mythical figure. Her’s a chance for everyone to see that I’m just a normal person. You can talk to me. We can have a civil exchange
3. Lastly, I’m moving on to other things. When I started this site it was simply to put up my side of the story because Arianna lied about me so much that people were threatening my life. Since then I’ve shown how Arianna repeatedly lied and vilified me for no reason. There’s nothing else for me to prove here. I’m not taking down the site but I am going to focus on other things and this is a good way for me to close this chapter. I’ll answer any questions then get on with the rest of my life.

How can I get my question answered?

You can call and leave a voicemail message or send SMS: 517.742.2552

Yes, this is really one of my numbers. No, it’s not my main number. It won’t actually ring my phone, so all calls to that number will go to voicemail. I won’t be looking at text messages until it’s time to answer questions so don’t expect a response.

You can send me a message on SnapChat: DoubleOPuddy

You can send email: BigBlackPuddyTat@gmail.com

I’ll hold two live streams where you can ask questions, live. I’ve unblocked everyone, even the Alpaca and Arianna. Everyone can come an play along. The live sessions will be on Sunday October 4th (between 9p and 11p Eastern) and Sunday October 11th (same times).

Some time after October 1st I’ll put up a page with responses. I’ll respond to every question I get between now and November 15th.

The rules are:

• Don’t be a dick. While I’m personally inured, people around me tend to get upset when others act like dicks. For the sake of having healthy discussion, I ask that you conduct yourself with a modicum of civility. If you can’t manage that, you’ll be kicked/banned/blocked.
• Anything that could reasonably be construed as a threat of bodily harm, harassment, incitement to violence or anything else of the sort will be reported to the authorities irrespective of who the target is.
• I will respect your privacy: If you don’t want to be identified. just say so and I’ll leave your name out when I respond. Obviously that doesn’t work if you come into my live stream and ask there.
• Off limit topics:
  • None — you can ask anything but that doesn’t mean you’ll get a satisfactory answer.
• Questions probably not worth asking:
  • Anything dehumanizing — While I love good japes and gibes as much as the next homonid, the point of this little exercise is to answer questions that actually might matter to people.
  • Anything related to the people who made threats against me — I’m not going to incriminate myself.
  • Questions about who I hate, who I’m mad at, or whether I plan to get back at anyone — First, I’m not going to incriminate myself. Second, I don’t hate anyone tied to all of this. I don’t care enough about Arianna to hate her. Ruby (Dabs) is a piece of shit not worth commenting on, Dylan might be a great guy but to me he’s been a piece of shit so as far as I know, he’s a piece of shit. MoonShine is so vapid, she makes dirt look scholarly. Alpaca… well I don’t believe in being cruel to animals so… no comment.
  • Questions about me being willing to forgive — If someone did something and they apologize, I’m willing to forgive them. Forgiving doesn’t mean I’ll trust them but we could at least get past the transgressions. Alpaca could apologize for attacking me for no reason and I’d forgive her. We’d never be friends but I could forgive. Opie could apologize for saying stupid shit and I’d forgive him. Brian L (Ari’s bouncer not the TopBadge) could apologize for being a little bitch and I’d forgive him. Ruby could apologize for being a piece of shit and I’d forgive her. I’d never have any of those people in my circle again but I could forgive their shitty behavior.
  • Questions that would ‘out’ people who are still in Arianna’s circle — I get messages every week from people who Arianna thinks are her friends. Some record their conversations with her, some give me summaries of the latest lies she’s trying to push, etc. It’s funny and sad that she has no idea how many people in her circle see right through her bullshit. To be clear, these are people who sought me out because she lied to them in the beginning, they bought into it and when they realized that she was lying they contacted me 1) to apologize and 2) to give me a heads up. I won’t betray their confidence

It’s coming up on one year since I first tried to step away from my narcissistic abuser, Arianna Folsom. Since then, I’ve dealt with much in the way of harassment (at her behest), death threats, anxiety, social isolation, and more. When I started this website it was with a heavy heart. At the time my understanding was:

• Arianna had cheated on me with another man and was covering it up by gaslighting me
• Arianna was lying about me, the nature of our relationship, and my character and conduct to her new conquests (Nugget/Nik, and AlpacaAnna)
• Because of the above lies, Nugget and I grew closer while Alpaca decided to attack and harass me without provocation.
• When I published pictures of my message exchanges with Arianna showing that she’d lied to Anna and Nugget, Arianna tried to bully me into silence.
• When the bullying didn’t work, she started claiming that I was trying to get her son taken away. She put on a very sappy sympathy exhibit for her viewers on MeetMe talking about me constantly, claiming that I was harassing her when in fact it was her and her viewers that were harassing me.
• At some point (in November) one of her viewers found one of my YouTube channels and made a death threat that was immediately taken down by YouTube but I saw the notification before the message was removed.
• I started getting a slew of death threats that I first wrote off as keyboard commando bullshit then I get a very personal threat sent to me that included specific details about my life and information about my nieces, who I do not discuss online.
• At that point I went to the police and turned over my phones (three of them) so they could do what they needed to do investigate the threats.
• I notified Arianna (around November 12th) that I had to turn over my phone to the authorities because, her claims that I was trying to get her son taken away from her lead to me turning over my phones to the authorities in multiple different jurisdictions and any one of them might happen see the text messages from her that discussed the times she drove drunk to pick up her son from school or the time she left him standing outside for hours because she was too high and fucked up to remember to go get him. In short: her actions created a situation where she could actually loose her son.
• On November 15th, I registered ariannafolsom.com to put up my side of the story because Arianna was too enamored of the attention she was getting from playing the victim. She’s a narcissist and needs to be the center of attention. She couldn’t care less if her actions lead to harm for me, all she wanted was to bask in the glow of those rallying around her because of her lies.

Less than a week after posting my first article the death threats stopped (largely). Apparently there was enough there that contradicted her version of events that the few people she’d tricked into threatening me took a step back.

November is just around the corner and I’ve been thinking about all the shit I’ve been through just because a shitty person feels so bad about herself that she needs to visit wrath upon those who get fed up with her bullshit and walk away from her. When we were together I bent over backwards to take care of her. When we broke up, I knew that she’d fucked Dylan but I let her lie go unchallenged because I don’t care who she fucks. I do care about being disrespected and I wasn’t going to tolerate disrespect, so I left. I wished her well and I thought that would be the end of it. Instead Alpaca fires off at me (again unprovoked), I try to work it out with Arianna and her lies lead to the situation we’re in now.

Since the breakup, I’ve discovered so much more about the ways she was lying and manipulating and I plan to discuss and dissect some of the things I found out:

• Her lying about me pursuing her as a GF when she’s the one who pursued a relationship with me
• Her lying about me messaging her all the time and being obsessed with her to her ex Victoria (we had conversations that clarified exactly how Arianna would use triangulation and gossip as a wedge between us)
• Her lying to Anna about me being controlling and sycophantic
• Her fucking Dylan (I discovered audio of them fucking that got caught by the tablet I bought for her son. The Amazon Alexa recordings ended up in my amazon account)
• Her lying to a slew of women she was trying to hook up with claiming either that I was just a fan who wanted to support her (making me sound like a fucking sugar daddy) or completely denying that we had any type of relationship at all
• The ways in which she talks shit about everyone in her life (and I do mean everyone) to make you predisposed to believe her future lies about them. She wants to stay in between you and everyone else so you can’t get together and compare notes to uncover her lies
  • One example is her talking about someone in the fashion industry named Michael Bui. She told me this sob story about how he used his wife Mida to get her into bed in a threesome knowing that she (Arianna) is into women (and presumably not into men although that’s a falsehood. She still insists that she’s a lesbian despite carrying on three secret sexual relationships with men during the time we were together). According to the story she told, during the threesome Michael was pushy and didn’t respect her boundaries. Afterward, according to Arianna, he kept rubbing up against her and hovering around her making her feel uncomfortable while they were at this industry event in Vegas. She said he kept pressuring her for sex absent the participation of Mida. Now, it’s important for me to say that Arianna is probably lying about that whole thing. Michael Bui probably has a completely different view of what happened and I’d bet that Mida’s and Michael’s views are closer to reality than the story Arianna told. So why would she do that? Because 1) it’s good for sympathy and 2) it gives her cover. If I buy into her version of events that I am less likely to be friendly with Michael and Mida who are both in her industry. She can keep the truth from coming out by staying in the middle, telling them things about me and telling me things about them. She’s a really good manipulator.

It’s emotionally draining to talk about some of this because while I quickly let go of my attachment to Arianna, it took a while for me to stop reacting to her ploys for more narcissistic supply from me. She’d do something and I’d react. Now there’s nothing she can do to cause any response other than me sending a packet of prepared documents to CPS, Orange County Sheriff’s dept, San Diego Sheriff’s dept, and the FBI. I’ve stopped caring about her wholesale. I don’t care about how she’s doing, what she’s doing, or anything else. I don’t care if she’s happy, sad, depressed, whatever. Unfortunately, I’m still recovering from the toll of having to deal with a narcissistic abuser’s smear campaign.

I’ve been working on a few projects that are about to launch and it would be nice to completely put all of this behind me. I don’t want to have to maintain a website about my crazy piece of shit ex and all the things she’s lied about or put me through. I’ve reached out to Arianna multiple times to try to put an end to the bullshit. I let it be known that I have no interest in being friends but we could at least stop wasting people’s time with her lies about me and me needing to tell the truth in a public forum (this web site) unfortunately she insists on holding on to her lies.

As a result she, ironically, is keeping this site up. This site would have been gone long ago if she’d just told the truth. The last time I made an offer to get past all of this was around May and she decided to lie about me, again claiming that I was obsessed with her. Since I can’t trust her not to continue to lie, the only way this site will get taken down is if she makes a public statement acknowledging all of the bullshit she’s responsible for and I do mean all of it. I know things now that she would never think I’d know of because after the site went up, people who had seen what a shitty person she is started sending me droves of text messages, recorded conversations, clips from her live streams, and more. So a half-assed partial admission won’t work. It would have to be the whole shebang and it would have to be very public. Her narcissism won’t allow her to make such an admission so this site will likely be up for years to come. I run my own servers and just renewed the hosting agreements at the various data centers I use for the next 5 years.

If you’re pissed off that there’s a site about her and you think it should be taken down, then encourage her to come clean. It costs me nothing to maintain this site so I can leave it on autopilot for the next decade or more.